Blog posts with the tag "Military Couples"

Guest Perspective: Embracing the Power Struggle: Sometimes Marital Rough Times Can Usher In Deeper Connection

By Jessica Soule  on 18.02.2026 11:59 am

In long-term relationships, there is a pattern many clinicians recognize: early infatuation and connection often give way to a period of conflict or power struggle, which — if navigated successfully — can lead to a more mature and stable form of partnership. Some relationship development models describe this process in more detail, but the core idea remains the same: if couples are to reach long-term stability and satisfaction, they often have to move through periods of turmoil rather than around them.

Staff Perspective: “Do you have children?” The Milspouse Elephant in the Room

By heather tompkins  on 16.07.2025 9:02 am
Dr. Heather Tompkins

Life as a military spouse is synonymous with frequent moves, starting over, and re-establishing connections. For a large portion of my married life, each PCS (Permanent Change of Station) and the initial social functions that followed brought with it a certain angst related to connecting- especially with other military spouses. Although I knew the intent was to meet, interact, and form connections, there tended to be an “elephant in the room” at each of these gatherings.

Staff Perspective: Cleats, Jerseys and “Kicking Balls” - Finding a Sense of Belonging

By heather tompkins  on 23.04.2025 10:55 am

As Month of the Military Child (April) comes to an end and Military Spouse Appreciation (May) begins, I have been reflecting on my experience as a military spouse. The old adage, “it takes a village” comes to mind in relation to these experiences and how “my village” has helped me cope with the challenges of military life. With another pending PCS and not looking forward to the stress of moving, I take pause to appreciate the opportunities for new connections each duty station has brought.

Staff Perspective: Couples Counseling as Preventative Care - A Transitive Model

By Adria Williams  on 26.02.2025 10:20 am
Dr. Adria Williams

Quick question for my military couples: “How did you make it through the pandemic?” Answers range from “It brought us closer” to “We didn’t.” For me and my husband, the answer was couples counseling. As a therapist, I wish I could say that I share this response with pride. I do say it openly—to model healthy behavior for clients, friends, family, and the public—but inside, I’ve felt a twinge of discomfort. Call it fear (of judgment), doubt (about whether it’ll work for us), or embarrassment (about exposing marital imperfections).

Staff Perspective: Never An Even Split

By Kristyn Heins  on 11.02.2025 10:54 am
Kristyn Heins, Ph.D.

When you’ve decided to officially share a life with someone, maybe through marriage, civil union, common law, or any other way, you may go into it with the assumption this is 50/50. This is a partnership where together we will put effort into building a life we love. Few of us have an outright conversation about expectations and roles, we just think, “I love this person and they love me and we will figure out our own way”.

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